Inability to connect with others..?

Nobody is a bigger booster of self help for depression than me, but your question screams I NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP. Get yourself a doctor or a counselor by any means necessary. If it means going to the hospital dragging a 100-pound wooden cross and telling them that you're Jesus Christ and you want to have the Last Supper in the Psych Ward, do it. Overdose, family so dysfunctional the mom is denying the daughter necessary medical care ... What more proof do we need?